Those Walk Among Us - Part 2

-

When the Fail is so strong, one Facepalm is not enough.
And here goes your part 2

"Pizza"

While working at a pizza parlour I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook Asked him if he would like it cut Into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time Then said 'Just cut it  into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry Enough  to eat 6 pieces.

They walk among us!


"Dumb as a box of Rocks"

A  noted psychiatrist was a guest speaker at an academic function where Nancy Pelosi happened to appear. Ms Pelosi took the opportunity to schmooze the good doctor a bit and asked him a question with which he was most at ease.

"Would you mind telling me,  Doctor" she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"

"Nothing is easier", he replied. 'You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If the person hesitates, that puts you on the track..

"What sort of question?" asked Pelosi.

Well, you might ask, "Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?''

Pelosi thought a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about  history"

They walk among us!


"Traffic Camera"
                                                       
A man was driving when he saw the flash of a traffic camera. He figured that his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though he knew that he was not speeding... Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed. Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed. He tried a fourth time with the same result.. He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past, this time at a snail's pace...

Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt..

Sadly, they walk among us!


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Anonymous Confessions

-
Image
Let's play a game, shall we? Apparently there's been an exhibition, a public art project for the american artist  Candy Chang  who thought it would be interesting to open up a space where people can anonymously project their confessions, their deepest secrets, and enjoy the reaction of whoever reads it. Source: Original Article "By the end of the exhibition, over 1500 confessions were displayed on the walls. It’s about sex, love, or fears of dying alone. By collecting the confessions of the hotel’s visitors, this project seeks to create a cathartic sanctuary for this temporary community and help us see we are not alone in our quirks, experiences, and struggles as we try to lead fulfilling lives." Source: Original Article Source: Original Article This post is written for the benefit of the public. I invite you everyone to do the same, let's share our secrets. Hint : Post your confession in the comment field below while choosing the " ...
Read more

The Death of Laurent Schwebel

-
Image
An email found its way to my inbox, with a PowerPoint presentation attached, seemingly having photographs inside, in a way to remember the great photographer Schwebel who was stabbed lately in Buenos Aires, while taking snapshots of a local memorial. Such emails are easily thrown into the garbage bin usually, but the familiarity of the photographer's name was the reason I opened the presentation: And what a shock that was! Firstly, here's a translated extract of the Swiss Grandes Espaces  on the latest incident: Wednesday morning, February 8, 2012, Laurent Schwebel, 52, was stabbed to death by a thug who stole his camera in the center of Buenos Aires. The murderer, 24, was chased by witnesses of the drama, and apprehended by the police. Lawrence returned from Antarctic trip with Christian Genillard, and rejoiced to discover the Iguassu Falls before returning to his Alsace. More on the incident is found here . Laurent Schwebel You might be wonder...
Read more

Forward Forum - The Booklet

-
Image
I've been looking around for a digital copy of the Forward Forum booklet, the recruitment forum that took place last weekend in BIEL, Beirut. I attended for the sake of getting a copy of that booklet, a role I played ever since I was in college, and of course to meet my peers and exhibiting companies. I usually get the booklet and share it among friends, and whoever needs it and for some reason couldn't be there. Here's an extract of the organizers' webpage : "After last year's tremendous success and on behalf of CAREERS & E Square –Events & Exhibitions , it gives us great pleasure to invite you to the thirteenth edition of the International Forum for Orientation & Recruitment, FORWARD 2013 and to the third edition of, BUSINESS 2013 which will be both held at BIEL- Lebanon from Thursday, 18th till Sunday, 21st April 2013 and from 4:00 pm till 10:00 pm ." The forum takes place every year, mostly in BIEL, at the beginning of spring sea...
Read more

Roadmap to a National Cycling Day

-
Image
Here's why tomorrow, April 25th, is a big day in the history of Lebanon. For decades we had been accustomed to riding cars, whether for leisure or for work; that same car had been going hand in hand with social status: you have no car, you then belong to the poor. Owning a high end car, on the other hand, meant you're doing well, and thus earn society's respect in some way. Fast forward to last year where two girls, with the help of friends, had started what we know today as the BikeToWork day, years after being infatuated with the charm of the four-wheelers, as in to try and encourage an entire nation to go back to the days the majority had no cars. How did they get around? How were delivery boys getting by? How did my grandfather and yours go to work at their younger years? It's that mesmerizing slinky beast we all call the bicycle. I mean, it's often cheap, doesn't really cost any maintenance really, doesn't break down easily, doesn't take up ...
Read more

Anonymous Confessions, The Epilogue

-
Image
Source:  Original Article The Last Confession was the straw that broke the camel's back: What I started on my previous post  was phenomenal, it was pretty obvious that I had to document it. If you're still unfamiliar with what I'm talking about, check the Anonymous Confessions blog post; I had announced I want to play a game, based on the work of an american artist. Source:  Anonymous Confessions The thread of confessions started out with the following: "I still love her" "İt hurts not to see him" "I do care about what people think of me" Several anonymous persons decided to join later on, upon seeing the first feedback, and thought it might be a good idea to throw in their own confession, since, in the end, everything was totally anonymous. The majority spoke of relationships, parents, self esteem, aspirations, and unfinished love stories. Until the last guest posted their comment : "Confession 1: I wish I can help everyone who...
Read more

The Tourist That Shall Never Leave

-
Image
I never had thought I’d see the day when I mourn the library. I’m still literally traumatized, two hours later, convincing myself what I had heard about burning down the library was inaccurate, that some agencies are exaggerating and that it could be some ignorants were trying to cause damage to a shop nearby. It was all until I laid eyes upon that photo of the flames hurling out of the library’s door in that tiny alleyway, that I believed the news. The moment I heard of the news, and since I was at my place in Beirut, I packed my stuff instantly and tried to head back to Tripoli. To my bad luck, 40 minutes on the highway weren’t enough to get me a bus to my old city.. I felt so powerless I sat on the sidewalk and started shivering. A little while later, and just moments ago, the news was confirmed, the books are to ashes now, the old library is gone. I want you to understand it’s not about the books. Yes the books are worth a lot, a lot of money, a lot of effort, sweat, night shif...
Read more